Each person goes through their own fair share of difficulties, and oftentimes, we all find a toxic person or two that leaves a bit of a lasting impression. For me, it was a person who was very good at reneging. This toxic trait left such a lasting impression, in fact, that even today, I find it hard to trust people to hold to their word.
The healing process of such things is long and arduous, but I find having friends around to help build us back up is the best way to help the wound close quicker. I think the greatest advice I was given was that I could be angry and upset about it, but I should never let it harden my heart. Staying open to the possibility of loving others, despite having dealt with a few toxic traits here and there, has allowed room for compassion and critical thinking. For that, I'll always be thankful.
Renege | rɪˈneɪɡ: verb: go back on a promise, undertaking, or contract; another term for revoke; (archaic) renounce or abandon
When I first discovered renege, and even now, I immediately thought of the word, renegade. At first, I felt maybe it was because of the way it sounded. But looking at the two definitions, I can certainly see a deeper similarity.
In fact, digging deeper into the word, itself, I notice that if we take apart renegade a little further, the Latin roots, re- (meaning expressing intense force) and negare (meaning deny), are the exact same as renege. Renegade, however, has more of a specific root. It originally appeared as a derivative of the Spanish word, renegado, whose Latin root is renegatus, according to Oxford Dictionary.
Strangely enough, though, renege was the first word to appear between the two. It's first use in history, according to Merriam-Webster, was 1548. By contrast, the first use of any form of renegade wasn't until 1611, more than sixty years later. That makes me wonder if renegade was influenced in some way by renege.
Renege | ri-ˈneg: verb: to go back on a promise or commitment; revoke; (obsolete) to make a denial
In today's example, I went back and dug through one of the books that brought my heart back to writing as a possible career choice. Shad Brooks has been a huge inspiration in my life, and when his announcement for Shadow of the Conquerer came out on his Youtube channel, Shadiversity, I realized that all I really needed to make my dream of writing come true was to put forth the effort.
The book, itself, is a beautiful mixture of horror and wonder in an epic fantasy tale. We watch a story of possible redemption for a man who wouldn't normally be seen as redeemable. Part of me still wonders if the character really is redeemable. But I think that really remains to be seen, and from what Shad has said, there will eventually be another book in the story. I do love how he leaves the decision up to the reader as to whether or not the main character is someone worth all that he received. It makes the story that much more believable.
In the particular scene, the characters are actually talking about a crime the protagonist didn't commit in his previous life. In the end, he simply allowed the blame to fall on him because, "...what's one more drop in a sea?" Just another thing that goes to show you how guilty he really felt about all of the atrocities he had committed.
"I...I had sat in as an arbiter in that negotiation. I had wondered why the Knife Makers had finally reneged on their stance."
An interesting word for a wonderfully intriguing book. I highly recommend you go grab a copy, and if you're a writer who enjoys the medieval setting in any way, go check out Shadiversity and support a fellow writer.
Until then, if you have any extra words you'd like to throw my way, be sure to let me know about them! Until next time, happy reading!
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